Avoidance

Is Avoiding Eye Contact Always a Trauma Response?

Not necessarily. While trauma can influence how we experience being seen, most gaze aversion has far more ordinary explanations. People look away to think, to listen, to show respect, or simply because direct eye contact competes with concentration. Drawing on the work of Stephen Porges, Allan Schore, Ruth Lanius, and Laurence Heller, this article explores the relationship between gaze, safety, and the nervous system, while challenging the common assumption that looking away always signals emotional wounding.

Resonant vs. Discordant Leadership: Navigating the Balance Between Connection and Accountability

How do leaders hold people accountable without becoming controlling, and build trust without avoiding difficult conversations? This article explores the balance between resonant leadership and accountability, offering practical insights for creating teams that are both high-performing and deeply connected.

Emotional Avoidance: The Hidden Crisis in Our Lives

Why do so many of us struggle to face our emotions directly? This article explores the hidden costs of emotional avoidance, how it shapes our relationships and conflicts, and why developing greater emotional awareness is essential for personal growth and genuine connection.

Four Ways We Avoid Our Feelings—and What to Do Instead

Why do we distract ourselves, worry, criticize ourselves, or tell stories when uncomfortable emotions arise? Clinical psychologist Sandra Parker explores the ways we avoid our feelings and introduces the concept of "unrest" as a doorway to emotional awareness, self-compassion, and growth.